Single Mothers: Supermoms! part 1

By Maureen Mennor Nwaezeigwe

The list  of great men and women who were raised by single mothers will blow your mind! You see, when a woman falls into this zone accidentally, she gets terrorized by fears: fear of stigma,  fear of failure, fear of suffering if she does not have strong economic base, and for those who really fought hard to keep their marriage and husband; fear of loneliness! People pass all sorts of judgments, some  mock her and call her a loser, wayward and not submissive enough to stay under a man. If you haven't been mocked yet, wait for it, it will come; but do me the favour of waiting for it with a big smile on your face and then look past the mockery and see a bright future ahead. 

So you are having a bad break right now? does it hurt? could you have been wiser and not gotten yourself in this mess? Yes, yes and maybe!!!!But you see, am yet to meet any human being( and they may exist, just have not met one of such yet) who has not done things or said things they wished they never did nor said. I dont believe those who say that they have never regretted anything, I dont call them liars either, but I enjoy watching them feel good about themselves when they drift into their utopianism. I  do not believe in crying over spilled milk, but as much as I hated my tears being seen by people, I do believe greatly that it is OK to  cry sometimes, albeit, privately. You must however know when to beat yourself  up, cry, and when to dust yourself, get up and try again. It is not yet your destination, the journey is still on. Some start early and arrive earlier than others, some start well, but then suffer some bad breaks, some start very late but still arrive in good time, so stop comparing yourself with others and focus on your race because destinies differ.

You have to cry privately because you do not need pity, what you need first of all,  is your strong self and a source of strength greater than your strong- self. You need to gather financial strength, emotional and spiritual strengths, so that you can become the Supermom that you need to become to succeed. Dont bother so much about the absence or inadequate presence of a father figure in the lives of your kids, you can develop your self so much that not much will be lacking psychologically in the lives of your precious ones and they shall end up really OK . Make sure you sit your kids down from time to time to have "meetings" with them, to explain things to them and discuss decisions with them. If you focus so much on the absence of a father figure instead of filling the gap with your Supermom- self,  it could become a weakness that could be taken advantage of; if you are not careful. Focus on what you have, and that is: YOU.

Maureen Mennor Nwaezeigwe

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